Add the Cardiovascular Research Foundation to the list of organizations we won't work for. Not cuz we're above the work -- we'd just have no idea what to tell them.

The scoop:

NEW YORK -- A charity foundation's former accountant, accused of embezzling heart disease research funds to pay an Ohio dominatrix to beat him, pleaded guilty Tuesday to grand larceny and admitted that he stole more than $237,000.

Abraham Alexander, 45, of East Meadow, N.Y., admitted he stole the money from the Cardiovascular Research Foundation between Nov. 2, 2003, and April 20, 2005, by using company credit cards and writing checks to himself...

At least $11,000 stolen by Alexander, who was an accounts payable executive, went to pay Through the Looking Glass, an online company run by Columbus-based dominatrix, Lady Sage, according to the Manhattan district attorney's Robert Morgenthau's office...

Lady Sage's Web site features numerous photographs of the 43-year-old pain professional in a leather, metal-studded thong and bra, high-heeled lace-up boots, a leather dress and in what appears to be a red latex rubber evening dress.

Lady Sage says on her Web site she charges $250 an hour for her services and $1,500 for eight hours. She says the client pays her expenses if she has to travel for a meet-and-beat session.

On the site, she declares, "Professional domination sessions are about good people having great fun." And, "I love nothing more than coaxing you to accept more pain and torment for my pleasure. I love holding your very soul in my hands."