Construction began last Wednesday on a $35 million Florida children’s hospital that will bear the Disney name — a first for the brand. According to reports, Disney “imagineers” currently are working to “develop the patient experience.”

I normally wouldn’t presume to offer my pitiful, uncreative recommendations to someone who has earned the lofty title of “imagineer” … but in this case, what the hell:

All patients will be assigned a PCC (Primary Care Character).

Semi-private rooms are standard.

Mealtime will patriotically showcase an all-American cuisine.

Disney’s most treasured icons will chip in with patient care.

Uninsured patients will be escorted out of the building by Mickey himself.