Media Orchard announced today that it has hired precocious toddler Poopypants McGee to write most Media Orchard posts for the foreseeable future.

“After an extensive cost-benefit analysis by Media Orchard’s parent company, the Idea Grove, we have determined that Idea Grove President Scott Baradell’s time is better spent on billable hours, and that writing blog posts is not a cost-effective utilization of his time,” said Slap Forehead, the Idea Grove’s chief financial officer. “We have thus undertaken a massive worldwide search (in the form of a Craigslist ad) to identify a CARB (Cheap Ass Replacement Blogger) for Scott Baradell.”

Adds Meem Littlegay, director of market research for the Idea Grove: “The hiring of CARBs has been a highly efficient tactic used by some of the most widely read blogs in marketing and across all industry sectors. Our research indicates that once a blog reaches a certain threshold of subscribers, people keep coming back to the blog no matter what kind of SAC (Stupid Ass Content) they’re slinging. Of course, Media Orchard isn’t really at that threshold — but screw it.”

Said Baradell: “Poopypants McGee, age 3 and three quarters, writes posts for a pat on the head and a french fry. How can I compete with that?”

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